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Life is full of ups and downs, but sometimes we need help getting back on course. Sometimes it can feel like waves are crashing over us as life changes occur around the clock with no sign that they will stop anytime soon; this feels overwhelming at times when there's so much going wrong in every aspect of our lives (work/careers, family relationships). It becomes difficult to balance joy & grief because you're constantly having one feeling followed by another without any room for adjustment or peace within yourself which leads some people into feelings such depress especially if they've experienced loss in any capacity (death, job, etc).
If you're feeling lost and struggling to find your way back to happiness, here are some tips that may help you get back on track:
-Talk to someone who will understand and can offer helpful advice & support such as a family member, friend, therapist, etc.
-Identify your main sources of stress and work on ways to reduce or eliminate them if possible.
-Make time for things that make you happy and help relieve stress such as reading, listening to music, spending time in nature, etc.
-Exercise regularly as it releases endorphins which have mood-boosting effects.
-Challenge your negative thoughts by finding evidence to support the opposite.
-Focus on the positive aspects of your life and be grateful for what you have, even if it doesn't seem like much.
-Focus on the present moment.
-Eat a healthy diet as what you eat can affect your mood and energy levels. Avoid drugs & alcohol as they will only make things worse in the long run.
-Remember that bad times don't last forever and eventually things will get better, even if it's too difficult right now.
What tips do you have for dealing with life's ups and downs? Share them in the comments below!
I specialize in trauma therapy and work with individuals who have experienced a wide range of traumas and adverse life experiences. I believe that everyone has the potential for growth and healing, and my goal is to help you tap into that potential so that you can create a brighter future for yourself. I offer free consultations so that we can discuss how I might be able to help you. If you're interested in learning more, please don't hesitate to get in touch.
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Have you noticed that many of your thoughts are useless?
Our mind stays busy with stories from the past, criticizing the present or worried about the future. And between the past, the critic and the future, we miss the present moment.
The good news is that we can teach our mind to live in the present moment. Imagine your thoughts are like those of a spoiled child catching your attention with screams and tantrums. If you pay attention to the screams and tantrums you will be reinforcing the behavior, but if you ignore it sooner or later the negative behavior will disappear. Our thoughts are the same.
When you notice that your mind is distracted by thoughts, acknowledge it and bring your attention to what you are doing right now. Choose your battles. We always have options in difficult situations: we can stay and try to change it, we can stay and accept the situation as it is, we stay and make it worse, or we can leave the situation by just and leaving. You choose.
Do not expect different results in your life when you just give excuses that you cannot change. Focus on what you have, not what you do not have. In what you focus will determine your reality. Use your strengths to achieve the changes you want.
EMDR Therapy can reduce the symptoms of fear for people suffering from phobias, panic attacks, obsessive-compulsive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder.
Remember that life is lived in the now!
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Why do you allow fear to control your life?
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE! Therefore, allow each moment to count.
Objectively explore what is the real risk of the decision you have not made because of fear.
What part of that fear is legitimate and that part is just a story you are making in your mind? Ask yourself:
• "If I do not do this, will I regret it for the rest of my life?" Regret is one of the most disappointing and discouraging human emotions.
• "Is there something I fear and must overcome if I want to achieve my goals?" Often, focusing on what we can get, such as goals, helps us reduce fear.
• "What is the worst thing that could happen to you if I make this decision that I fear so much?" Can you possibly die? I know this sounds extreme, but this can help put things in perspective.
Overcoming your fears is difficult. I will not say it is not. Think about the fears and worries you face in your life and that prevent you from reaching your goals.
Maybe those fears that stop you only exist in your mind and are fueled by painful experiences of the past. But regardless of the cause or root of your fears, the consequences will be the same:
YOU WILL NOT BECOME THE PERSON YOU WANT TO BE
I encourage you to turn your fear and worries into fuel. I invite you to open your arms like wings and make way for those areas in your life that you want to improve. In doing so, you will be creating your own destiny.
Going forward means that you have the courage to leave behind everything that keeps you from growing and being genuinely happy.
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Effects of PTSD/Trauma on Children
A recent study published in the Journal of Psychiatric Research, establish that PTSD/Trauma on children may alter and cause changes to the brain that are similar to a traumatic brain injury or head trauma. The study results suggest that a childhood trauma could cause the same inflammation in the brain that is seen in after a concussion, this inflammation could linger for a while. The study also identifies three important factors that will impact the intensity of the inflammation in the brain: 1) if the trauma occurred before the age of 8, 2) the severity of the trauma, and 3) if the PTSD/Trauma lasted for more than six months. This could lead to long-term consequences such as the development of psychiatric disorders later. “Knowing the levels of any biological marker will help us identify patients at higher risk and suggest comprehensive, intensive treatment from the beginning”. A similar study of soldiers who were exposed to intense stress reported similar findings.
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The ability of adults to reason in some situations is different from that of children and adolescents. There may be situations that the adult would perceive harmless or innocent, whereas for a child it could be frightening. An example of this could be the visit to a doctor, minor surgical intervention or an injection for vaccines.
Exposure to new experiences in children could prove to be traumatic. This is because, contrary to adults, children may reason to a new experience with fear because they do not know if they will be sure not to suffer any harm. Life experiences in adults allow them to reason differently, for example, going to cut their hair, to wear unpleasant clothes, to try new foods, to sleep alone and/or with the lights off, to visit new places and to interact with people. The way to rationalize these experiences is different and even think that we should feel fear we could see it as something ridiculous or absurd. Unfortunately, in these circumstances in some cases for a child, it would be a real challenge to face the experience, and they can have or feel real terror and panic. That feeling of terror can continue to affect the child for a long time and even in adulthood.
It is unhealthy that in the behavioral and emotional management of adults towards children to minimize the children’s expressions of experiences that the adults may be considered innocent or harmless. Doing so, ignoring the moment of terror that the child may be feeling, can cause an emotional trauma, which could affect the child for the rest of his life. For example, when the father takes his child for a haircut or to the dentist, but the child refuses intensely, with much fear and yet is forced under such circumstances. In this case, the child may begin to experience nightmares, phobias and changes in behavior. Because of this experience, the child may have developed some emotional trauma and this trauma can still be present in adult life. This trauma could in turn, impact his relationship with his dad. It is very possible that subconscious feelings of anger may arise for the rest of his life toward his father’s figure because he never established or tried to resolve the emotional trauma that occurred during his childhood.
The discipline aspect is very important in the development of a child. During the period of discipline adults should not minimize the seriousness of the children’s emotional reactions. If the child demonstrates disproportionate negative emotions toward a situation, the adult should consider this as a warning that something is truly wrong. The adult should consider intervening in the moment and give the child time to ask about their fears, sensations and feelings. First of all, the adult must try to make the child feel secure, confident that there is no danger, and as long as it is reasonable, the adult should try to grant his wishes.
In the adult life we may experience feelings and emotions of anger, regret, sadness, fear, anxiety and other negative emotions. These feelings, when there are no causes identified in the present and consciously, it is very possible that they originate from past experiences. If these feelings and emotions have been causing a negative quality of life for a long period of time, you should consider visiting a mental health professional. The help process can help you reduce and eliminate these unpleasant emotions. When you do this, you could live more free of emotional and physical pain.
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EMDR Therapy for the Treatment of Emotional Trauma
In the EMDR Therapy process, the therapist works with the client to identify a specific problem that will be the focus of treatment. The client describes the traumatic incident, from which he is helped by the therapist to select the most important and most distressing aspects of that incident. While the client makes eye movements (or any other Dual Attention Stimulus), other parts of the traumatic memory or other memories come to mind. The therapist interrupts eye movements every so often to ensure the client is processing properly.
Dual Attention Stimulus used in the EMDR Therapy (previously called Bilateral Stimulation) may be a visual, here the patient moves the eyes from side to side guided by the therapist; auditory, here the patient hears alternate sounds in both ears or kinesthetic where the therapist tapping gently and alternately on the patient's hands or shoulders. This facilitates the connection between the two cerebral hemispheres, achieving information processing and reducing the emotional load.
The therapist guides the process, making clinical decisions about the direction the intervention should follow. The goal is for the client to process the information about the traumatic incident, leading to an "adaptive resolution", as stated by Francine Shapiro this mean: a) a reduction of symptoms; b) a change in beliefs and c) the possibility of functioning better in daily life.
The approach used in EMDR Therapy is based on three main points: early life experiences, stressful experiences of the present, and thoughts and behaviors desired for the future.
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BENEFITS OF EMDR THERAPY