The ability of adults to reason in some situations is different from that of children and adolescents. There may be situations that the adult would perceive harmless or innocent, whereas for a child it could be frightening. An example of this could be the visit to a doctor, minor surgical intervention or an injection for vaccines.
Exposure to new experiences in children could prove to be traumatic. This is because, contrary to adults, children may reason to a new experience with fear because they do not know if they will be sure not to suffer any harm. Life experiences in adults allow them to reason differently, for example, going to cut their hair, to wear unpleasant clothes, to try new foods, to sleep alone and/or with the lights off, to visit new places and to interact with people. The way to rationalize these experiences is different and even think that we should feel fear we could see it as something ridiculous or absurd. Unfortunately, in these circumstances in some cases for a child, it would be a real challenge to face the experience, and they can have or feel real terror and panic. That feeling of terror can continue to affect the child for a long time and even in adulthood.
It is unhealthy that in the behavioral and emotional management of adults towards children to minimize the children’s expressions of experiences that the adults may be considered innocent or harmless. Doing so, ignoring the moment of terror that the child may be feeling, can cause an emotional trauma, which could affect the child for the rest of his life. For example, when the father takes his child for a haircut or to the dentist, but the child refuses intensely, with much fear and yet is forced under such circumstances. In this case, the child may begin to experience nightmares, phobias and changes in behavior. Because of this experience, the child may have developed some emotional trauma and this trauma can still be present in adult life. This trauma could in turn, impact his relationship with his dad. It is very possible that subconscious feelings of anger may arise for the rest of his life toward his father’s figure because he never established or tried to resolve the emotional trauma that occurred during his childhood.
The discipline aspect is very important in the development of a child. During the period of discipline adults should not minimize the seriousness of the children’s emotional reactions. If the child demonstrates disproportionate negative emotions toward a situation, the adult should consider this as a warning that something is truly wrong. The adult should consider intervening in the moment and give the child time to ask about their fears, sensations and feelings. First of all, the adult must try to make the child feel secure, confident that there is no danger, and as long as it is reasonable, the adult should try to grant his wishes.
In the adult life we may experience feelings and emotions of anger, regret, sadness, fear, anxiety and other negative emotions. These feelings, when there are no causes identified in the present and consciously, it is very possible that they originate from past experiences. If these feelings and emotions have been causing a negative quality of life for a long period of time, you should consider visiting a mental health professional. The help process can help you reduce and eliminate these unpleasant emotions. When you do this, you could live more free of emotional and physical pain.
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Mindful Journey Center
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Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33316
EMDR Therapy in Fort Lauderdale, FL area